Annica ~ It’s the Pali word for impermanence. I have it tattooed on me as a reminder that everything is transient and attachment breeds suffering.
It crosses my mind fairly often, death. Sometimes I think about my husband dying, or a close family member. Sometimes it’s someone I’ve heard about in the media, and sometimes it’s my own passing. Even when I was much younger I used to think of myself dying a lot.
Especially now, as the seasons transition, I am reminded of death everywhere in nature. Trees are stripping down to their bones and gardens are paling over as they lie dormant in wait of warmer suns.
I don’t have a strong belief about what happens in the afterlife, but I choose to believe that my consciousness will continue on, and I like to think that this experience on earth will translate into a memory or some conscious continuity of clarity after transition.
I’m fascinated by stories of death; By people who have seemingly decided that they would pass on at a certain time, and those who’ve begun to transition and then decided to come back for a while. There’s also the unique and powerful stories of experience that many people report on as they process their death and ritualize their transition. It stirs this metaphysical energy in me in a way that excites, intrigues and mystifies.
The sacredness I’ve heard regarding some people’s death tends to emphasize the sacredness of my own life, and I’ve found that reflecting on death relieves me of many of the momentary dissatisfactions and complaints I am prone to entertaining.
There’s times when I can reflect on death from a place of non-attachment and acceptance and other times it deeply saddens me, mainly to think about losing a loved one. At this moment in time I’ve found myself feeling more of the latter. I notice that when I become quite attached to certain things in my life, it expands into a more global attachment to life itself and all the comforts within. This also happens when my connection to that which feels sacred and spiritual is thinned out.
Note my last blog post about Process, as I talked about my recent experience with creativity and all the momentum and self-inflicted expectation/attachment that’s been arising.
I haven’t fully transitioned from that space yet, but I took the day off today to spend time in reflection and grounding, reorienting myself to that which inspires, relaxes and moves me in a spiritual way. I think it's incredibly important to create space for this, and I don't do it enough. Today is an action step in the direction of growth.
This time off feels very necessary; time to just BE, to feel deeply, to explore.
I’m feeling called to read and write poetry, so for now, I’ll do that.
I encourage you to honor whatever needs to be explored and expressed within you. Give it space, let it breathe, then let it go.